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Feeling Unsettled or Unstable in Your Life?

Stability is one of the most important elements in life.

Webster’s Dictionary defines stability as:

“The quality, state, or degree of being stable; the strength to stand or endure.”

Stability in my life has been compromised since I was a young child—whether it was a place to live, food to eat, or the presence of a mother and father to comfort us during our most vulnerable and desperate times.

Between the ages of six and eight, I remember feeling the Holy Spirit tug on my heart. It was like I had a spiritual “Spidey sense” that taught me right from wrong. My mother was a single parent, and we were mostly raised by our grandmother and aunt—both of whom were emotionally unstable due to the circumstances of life and their upbringing on the islands.

My mother worked hard to provide for us, but every time we got up, it felt like life knocked us back down. But she always had crazy faith. For most of our childhood, we lacked a father figure, the freedom to simply be children, and the means to express ourselves in healthy ways. This led to poor choices and ungodly desires. I wanted to chase the glamour of this world and used God as my genie. I’ve come a long way in my life, but I still have some things I need to work on—things that keep me down. All I’ve ever wanted is stability. But I could never seem to achieve it. Why? Well, it took me many years to figure that out. And now that God has revealed it to me, it’s my responsibility to make the necessary changes.

“A double-minded man is unstable in all his ways.” – James 1:8

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The Struggle Between Two Worlds

For most of my life, I pursued the things of this world over the things of the Kingdom of God.

I wanted:

• A big, fancy, high-paying corporate job to live an easy lifestyle.
• Purity, while still desiring multiple relationships.
• A clear mind and focus, yet continued to smoke marijuana and drink alcohol.

I was trying to have both—the blessings of Yahweh and the pleasures of the world.

But I’m here to tell you: you can’t have both. Trying to live in between leads you nowhere. Eventually, you’ll look back on your life and ask, “What am I really doing? What am I really looking for?”

This is not everyone’s story, but it is mine.

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On Being Selfish

Most of my life, people called me selfish. I worked really hard to be selfless—but over time, I realized something deeper.

That word, selfish, wasn’t just coming from people—it was God speaking through them.

Why?

Because if I care more about my desires than about God’s will, then yes—I am selfish.

• If I want a big, comfortable house instead of going out and preaching the Gospel—that’s selfish.
• If I choose a high-paying job over using the gifts God gave me to write and teach—that’s selfish.

For years, I chased money. But I learned that money doesn’t bring joy—only temporary happiness.

Happiness is a feeling. Joy is a choice.
And joy can exist in any circumstance, if we choose it.

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The Danger of Chasing False Stability

Everything I chased for the sake of “stability” did the opposite. It depleted me—my energy, my resources, and my spirit.

God can appoint us for a purpose, but we can reject that purpose through disobedience.

In 1 Samuel 15, God rejected Saul as king because he disobeyed. He was supposed to destroy everything after defeating the Amalekites—but he kept the spoils and offered them as a sacrifice, thinking that would please God.

But God wasn’t pleased—because obedience matters more than sacrifice.

“To obey is better than sacrifice.” – 1 Samuel 15:22

Saul listened to the people over God. He didn’t think his calling was significant enough. He lacked faith in God and in himself. And as a result, he was rejected.

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The Cost of Disobedience

I now have a wife and children—and I realize that my disobedience doesn’t just affect me.

It affects them too.

Every choice I made in selfishness or instability has had a cost—not just for me, but for the people I love.

The decisions we make ripple out, touching not only those around us, but also the people we’re meant to impact for God’s glory.

God requires full devotion and full obedience. You can’t live in-between.

I don’t want to waste my life going through the same destructive cycles over and over. Because the truth is—the older I get, the harder it becomes to obey. My heart grows desensitized, hardened toward God’s Word.

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True Surrender

I’m learning that true submission to God means:

• Praying about every decision
• Fasting regularly
• Giving Him full lordship over my life
• Obeying Him even when it’s uncomfortable

If you want stability in your life, you must be willing to give up what you want, and trust what God wants—even when it doesn’t make sense.

He knows where He’s taking you. He has plans to use you in mighty ways—but you must surrender your desires and walk in obedience.

“Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine…” – Ephesians 3:20

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Biblical Promises of Obedience

Here are key verses that remind us of the blessings that come through obedience:

• Ephesians 3:20 – God’s power and blessings exceed anything we can imagine.
• Deuteronomy 28:1–12 – God promises prosperity and protection to those who obey.
• 1 Samuel 15:22 – Obedience is more valuable than any offering or ritual.
• Proverbs 3:5–6 – Trust in God, not your own understanding, and He will direct your path.
• Isaiah 1:19 – Willingness and obedience lead to abundance.
• John 14:21 – Obedience proves our love for God and leads to deeper relationship.
• 1 John 2:17 – The world fades, but those who do God’s will endure forever.

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Reflection Questions

• Are you striving for purpose in your desires, or in God’s?
• Are you serving yourself more than you’re serving Him?
• Where does your devotion truly lie—this world, or the heart of God?
• Would you rather sacrifice something to God, or simply obey Him?

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Call to Action

1. Take a moment of silence.
Write down three ways you’ve been selfish—where you’ve chosen your own path over God’s and surrender them to him.

2. Make an intentional decision to study God’s Word—especially scriptures on obedience. Choose one verse week to study and memorize, write it on a sticky note and put it everywhere.

3.Use only a pen, paper, and your Bible. No electronic devices. Let it be just you and God. Remove anything that can cause a distraction. Listen to three worship songs on your knees hands lifted and thanking God and praising him then jump in. Don’t be surprised if he wakes your butt up at 3 am.

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Final Thought

Stability isn’t found in status, money, comfort, or control.
True stability is found in obedience to God’s will.
It’s found in full surrender.
And in that surrender, you will find purpose, peace, and power.

Prayer

Heavenly Father, my Dad and Friend,
Forgive me for focusing on my own desires and goals rather than seeking what you have in store for me to accomplish. Help me to submit myself fully to You and to Your will, not mine.

Help me not to fight against what You’re doing in my life. Let me be in constant prayer. Align me with You. Help me to seek Your Kingdom above all else, because Your Word says that when I do, everything else will fall into place.

Lord, help me to believe in You more than I believe in my own thoughts and feelings. Help me to regulate my emotions and submit them to You. Forgive me for pursuing my own desires and the things of this world that will not last but be destroyed.

Help me to stand steadfast, and give me a deep hunger and desire to study Your Word so that I may know You more.

I ask this in Yeshua’s Name,
AMEN